We Are Our Childrens' Teachers

Its funny how life works. One day you are the child, it seems the next you are the parent, and then sometime later you become child-like again.

As a new week has begun, not to mention a new year, this idea of the circle of life is in my head. We pass on who we are from one generation to the next, sometimes without meaning too.

On the Today show this morning, the state of Georgia was the unwelcomed feature of one of its segments discussing the obesity rate in America, and specifically the Peach State. Over 1 million children in this state are considered overweight or obese. Kids. Children. Young people. Beings who probably are not fully aware of what being 'overweight' is. People who simply did what they were taught at home and probably didn't realize there was a problem or how to fix it. Many probably don't understand there was a problem in the first place.

The South has constantly been at the core of the obesity epidemic in America. Our fried food, sweet as syrup tea, our mega portions, etc. etc. But our history as a region allowed us to be that way. We were farmers, people who worked the land. People who had more sweat equity in a bushel of peanuts than you or I could imagine. And as a result, required massive amounts of calories to pull off a days work. People walked more from place to place, and therefore needed to intake more fuel to keep their bodies going. That's the way life was.

As technology set in and people didn't move around as much, no one paid attention to portion size as that is what they were used to. But sadly, what worked for one generation doesn't always fit what follows; and the past can be an excellent teacher, but living in the past can be a cruel reality. As the state of Georgia, and the South as a whole, is having to learn.

On a more personal note, I spent Sunday afternoon taking a walk with my mom around her property --what a splendid way to start a new year! As we discussed life and recent happenings and choices, it dawned on me how very much my life has resembled my mother's.

My mother is one of the most creative and yet, most perfectionistic people I know. After spending 10 years in the creative field, I know too well 'the creative curse' -- the waiting to the last minute to get things together, not wanting to shut down the creative process because you are on the brink of something BIG etc. etc. My mom doesn't have that problem. She has beaten every deadline she has set (when left to her own devices). Any space she has been working in is thoroughly spotless afterwards. She is 'creatively efficient'.

Yet, given her love of color and graphics, carpentry and other household projects, she was a math teacher for almost 25 years. A career she did not like one bit. A career she did well, but had little interest in. A career she choose because it made sense for her life based on other people's agendas.

At many times, my own life and career path has been just that. Choices made because they made sense for someone else's circumstances; and ultimately circumstances I put myself in. If I had my choice or the chance to change things long ago, I probably would have. As truly what I learned most from my Ivy League education is that I don't want to be working for 'the man' all my life. Yet, there was rent to pay, not to mention my love for travel; and in NYC -- much like anywhere else -- these things were not be given out as handouts with the morning Subway newspapers. So I stayed in advertising; and every trip somewhere new I would come home with another creative career -- becoming a yoga instructor in Costa Rica, opening a restaurant in some beach town, or writing a novel in Spain. Yet, when I checked my mail when I returned, its contents usually let me know a big job in advertising was the way to go. Corporate America was where the money was. And you are not in love with your job? No one is. Neither was my mom. And I am pretty sure my grandmother wasn't either. Probably true for 95% of people out there, and probably the same number could tell you in heartbeat what they would rather be doing.

Yet, we are taught by example. We learn from what we see. We don't mean to teach our children that 'fried and fat' is the way to be, or that following your dreams is a silly option. But sometimes our society and our history allows us to believe otherwise. Its the unspoken lessons that teach. Its the examples we set that instruct. Daily.

In an advertising campaign I worked on in New York for Girl Scouts of America, the client came to us and wanted help teaching girls about Math and Science, as young girls in our nation had exceedingly low test scores compared to the male counterparts. Through focus group after focus group, we listened to mothers say over and over how they always helped their daughters with their math homework or science projects... yet, when it was asked who handles the electronics in your house -- the tv and cable wires, the sound-system, etc. -- 9 out of 10 women said, "I let her dad handle it."

Whether we like it or not, we are the teachers of tomorrow's generation. What we allow to be okay for us, is what becomes okay for them. While some will break the mold, few people realize the problem until its too late; when true change seems and feels most impossible. But even then, that's when we can instruct, guide and encourage the change the most.

The game of life is never over when there is a tomorrow in front of us. Its never too late to make necessary changes, and its never too late to encourage necessary changes in our youth. "To try and be better, is to be better."

If life truly is about paying it forward, then we owe "better" to what comes after us.